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What are some funny and smart quotes?

11.06.2025 05:10

What are some funny and smart quotes?

“There is no rule against postal workers dating women. It just works out that way.”

“It’s a little known fact that pigs are the smartest animal. Scientists say that if pigs had thumbs and a language that they could be trained to do manual labor. They give you 20 to 30 years of loyal service and then at their retirement dinner, you can eat them.”

“The human brain can only operate as fast as its slowest brain cells. Too much alcohol kills brain cells, especially the slower, weaker ones. So, regular consumption of beer eliminates the slower brain cells after you’ve had a few beers which will speed up your brain.”

Why is the First Amendment referred to as a right to free speech instead of an immunity from punishment for one's words, regardless of their truthfulness?

They did a study between postal workers and chimpanze...

“It’s a little known fact that the tan became popular in the Bronze Age.”

“A Freudian slip is when you say one thing when you’re really thinking about a mother.”

The First At-Home Cervical Cancer Screening Device Was Approved by the FDA, Set to Roll Out This Year - Good News Network

Few people had funnier or smarter quotes than Cliff Clavin from the TV show, Cheers.

My sister Tracy sent me these a little while ago. I thought I’d share them. Thanks Trace.

“Ah just like all women. If they’re not turning down your proposal of marriage, they”re accusing you of suspicious behavior in the lingerie changing room.”

What advice would you give to a father of a teenage daughter on how to protect her from boys, dating, and social media? How should fathers discuss these topics with their daughters?

“Everyone in the Swiss Army owns a Swiss Army knife. That’s why no one messes with Switzerland.”